Wednesday, July 18, 2012

want to feel like mother of the year?

I am not a mother. I've never really wanted to be a mother, until I met manfriend. He wants kids, I want him, and I know we'll be a team. My biggest fear is doing it all alone. Probably because my mother had to. Daddy issues over here, big time. But I'd totally let manfriend knock me up. After he buys me a diamond and a house with a really big library, and possibly a pony.

Chapter 1 of Confessions of a Scary Mom by Jill Smokler begins with real mommy confessions. My favorite being, hidden in the pantry in a box labeled "flour" is top-of-the-line chocolate and a few joints. I rarely resort to it, but it's a comfort knowing it's there. Separated at birth over here, girl. Every chapter has it's confessions. On being pregnant, giving birth, taking care of a newborn, dropping the pounds, dealing with the biggest baby of all, your baby daddy, and hating other people's name a few. The confessions made me laugh out loud and terrified me at the same time. Jill Smokler is REAL. She's got a potty mouth, her stories are painfully honest, and I have quite possibly changed my mind back to not wanting to have children.

No comments: